Eli the wild beast goes to the library...

Have you ever seen the parents that walk around with their kid on a leash? Seriously? What is wrong with them? Treating their kids like an animal. Ok I will admit maybe I used to think this was weird until I had Eli. Eli is like an animal. I can’t take him many places with out having him on the leash anymore. If he isn’t strapped in the stroller he is hooked to the leash!


So today we finally made it to story time at the library today for the first time in a couple of months. Parker loves to go and pick out books and he will sit for the stories, but there is no way to get Eli to hold still. He just won’t do it. He has to wiggle and run and twitch. The leash is necessary at the library! We just can make it through without it.

Today, instead of paying attention to my wild child I was texting (oops) and I handed the leash to Parker. It was all he could do to hold on to that kid. Full tension on the rope, since they weight about the same it was a pretty equal fight.

Right in the middle of the quiet story time Parker’s little arm gives out and he shouts, “OH NO! He got loose!” I look up from my phone to see Eli like a wild beast busting out of a cage running as fast as he can down the little story time steps all the way to the bottom. I don’t think I have ever seen the kid move so fast. He throws himself around a little girl who was standing there a like a deer in the headlights! They both tumble to the ground and Eli had a death grip on the poor thing. I was down there pretty quick trying to pry him off the girl, but he just wouldn’t let go. It was like he had made his kill and was ready to eat! The little girl looked so scared, “Mommmmy!!!” All I could do was say sorry and hurry back to my seat with a better grip on the leash.

I think at first all the parents were a little nervous, but after I finally pulled him off I could hear a few chuckles. They were probably just relieved it wasn’t their kid he smashed in a choke hold.

It was weird to because through the whole event the story teller just kept reading as if everyone was able to see the book or hear. We were standing 6 inches from her feet blocking the whole show, but I think everyone there got their entertainment for the morning.

I laughed so hard after I was crying. Wish I could have got it on video. My words will never do the story justice.

Next time you see a kid on a leash don't judge. It is for your and your child's own protection! :)


Watch out for Eli the wild beast. Best left in a cage, or a on a leash.

It's not a tumor!

Possibly the most embarrassing experience in my life today. I never remember the embarrassing stories when people ask, so I thought maybe I would write this one down. I just had to laugh because I wanted to cry! Brian was sick today so I had to run to our store to get his stuff for him to work on at home. I was trying to hurry so I showered and then threw on some clothes. I got the kids dressed and had a hard time getting them out the door. They were both being spazs today!

So when I got in the car I sat down and felt like I was sitting on something. I couldn’t see anything so I just went along. I went into our shop and got Brian’s stuff, then decided since I was out to go to Fred Meyer to grab a few groceries and drink to re-hydrate Brian. It was -10 today, or possible colder so I told the kids we had to hurry in the store. Moving those kids along is a lot of effort….it wares me out!

Once we got into the cart lobby of the store I threw the kids in one of those car baskets. It kind of felt like there was gum on my pants or something so I reached to check and there was a lump on the back side of my thigh! What the heck? I thought for a second and realized there was a sock, probable stuck in there from the laundry. I tried to wiggle it down my leg but it wouldn’t budge. Damn skinny jeans.

I hadn’t noticed but the cart attendant guy was staring at me from across the lobby. I couldn’t at this point just reach my hand down my pants to get it out, and I was wearing boots so I couldn’t get it from the bottom either! As I started to walk along the guy noticed that I saw he was looking at me funny. He tried to cover it up, “Is that cart working ok for you today” Yeah…why wouldn’t it be? So what if I have something on my butt!

Well at this point it was either drag the kids back outside in the freezing cold to grab the sock out or make it fast in the store and try to go unnoticed! It is really hard to push those carts through the parking lot so I just decided to go for it. It would be a funny story anyway right? At least it wasn’t a busy time at the store and I didn’t bump into anyone I knew. I am sure there were some people thinking I had a tumor on my backside, but what do they know anyway!??

When I got home I was laughing so hard. I ran into the bedroom to show Brian. I turned around and he looked at me like I was crazy. He said, “Is that a turd in your pants??”

HAHA! Oh my gosh that was embarrassing. Glad it is over, and now I have a moment that I can share on those dumb papers people make you fill out.

Poop (For lack of a better title)

First off I can't believe it has been 6 months since I last posted. Seriously, I might be busy with kids and stuff, but I have plenty of time I could be blogging more often than every 6 months! Not making any goals or promises about blogging, but I do want to keep sort of record of all the funny and crazy things that happen around here.

So actually that is why I am posting tonight. I wanted to post a story that I think is funny even though it is kind of gross. Brian is off being the busy guy he always is and I have no one to tell this story to except myself :)

A couple of weeks ago Eli and Parker were taking a shower and when it was time to get out I got them both dry and they were running around while I found their clothes to wear. Parker was yelling to me that the dog was getting on his bed, which is never allowed so I was headed in to take care of the issue. I came back into the hall way and almost stepped in the biggest pile of poop our dog has ever made in our house! I'm a screamer so of course I was freaking out and it scared the kids and especially the dog! She was crawling across the floor trying to make her way into our garage. I spanked her and put her in the garage and then went back to clean up the mess. Luckily it was a pretty dry log so it didn't stain the carpet. I was so mad!

After the mess was cleaned up I called up Brian and freaked out again...."You're dog is so stupid....I hate your dog....blah blah blah same old stuff I always say! He was pretty surprised that our dog who has been potty trained almost a year now would have such a weird accident. I assured him that she had just been out to go potty not long before the big poop. I was so mad on the phone and I had to get the kids dressed I ended up hanging up on Brian!

So then the thought occurred to me, "maybe it was Eli that pooped in the hall". There was no way. I asked him, "Eli did you go poo poo in the hall?" He just said his usual "No". But he since he does say that to everything I decided when I was putting his diaper on and getting him dressed to wipe his bum just to be sure. Well sure enough there was a streak on the wipe the same color as the turd in the hallway. The little stinker had dropped a load while running around naked!

I was appalled. Before this even became funny I disgusted that my child had pooped on my carpet!!! I have heard similar stories before, but I never could understand how it would happen. My children rarely get to be naked for more than a minute at a time so I just never saw it coming. Well there went that privilege!

With this story fresh in my mind tonight, while the kids we showering I got right on top of the diapers and PJ's and they were all ready to go before the kids even stepped foot out of the bathroom. That's how I normally do it and sense I don't want poop stains on my carpet that's how I have continued to do it. I learned my lesson. So I thought anyway.

This is where the story gets a little fuzzy. There was complete chaos for a couple minutes. If you know me, you know how I act when I start loosing control of the situation or of my kids. I started to like wig out and yell. I can't even think clearly I just start going in 4 directions AHH AHH AHH! So Parker comes bailing out of the bathroom butt naked on all fours barking like a dog and jumps on our dog and starts beating her. Then I look back at Eli coming out of the bathroom running around naked again and I yell to him, "Eli hurry come here and get your diaper on!" I turned back around to chase Parker down with his pull up and pajamas pry him off the dog and try to get the little doggy dressed, while at the same time lecturing him on how dogs don't bite or hit and how he needs to be a good  dog and listen to his mommy.

I thought I really getting through to the kid, I could tell he was listening and he was saying OK and then we both heard this squishy "TTTTHHHHHHpppppppppp...pppp" sound! I looked over and saw Eli squatting down in the hallway and I had to do a double take. If you know Eli, you know he is a stinker and every time he bends over he farts like that, and not to be too graphic but alot of times they do sound wet. So at first glance I saw my happy 2 year old passing some Eli gas, but a longer second look showed me a naughty little boy taking a crap on his mommy's carpet again! Not that a blame the poor un-potty trained child.....but really? 1 more minute or less and I could have had his diaper on him. Of course I screamed and he stepped in it ran into the bathroom. I chased him in there and stuck him on the potty while I cleaned up the mess. It was minimal damage....just a couple little squirty dumplings. Thank you Brian for feeding him Capn' Crunch Berries for breakfast. Now we have 2 little blue-green stains on our carpet.  

Needless to say, diapering will now be done before leaving the shower.

The End.

Potty training update

Things have been going great with the potty! Parker stays dry almost every day. I figured out that I just need to tell him to go rather than ask him if he needs to. Sometimes he does remember on his own, but for the most part I just send him every couple of hours. He is still having some trouble with #2, but I think he is just a little shy about it or something. I would say he does it about half of the time in the potty. The other day I heard this from the other room:

Parker-"Uh Oh! I don't get my bike now"

Me- "Uh Oh, how come?"

Parker-"Cause I just pooped in my underwears!"

Atleast he gets the concept right? And I never told him he would get a bike for pooping in the potty. I think he connected that to when I told him he could have some money if he goes. He was going so much he was getting alot of candy so we switched to money. Then another time when we were talking about bikes I told him he needs to save all his money to buy one. So there is the link. He doesn't get money or candy every time anymore....that wore off quick. Thank Goodness!

Parker is also going through another life changing experience. He gave up his binky finally!! On July 7 he was going to the range with his dad and Parker said that he wanted to trade his binky in for his new bow. So Brian took him over to our store and had him pay for the bow with his binky! He was so proud and confident until about 8:30 that night when he got home and it was time for bed! Oops. He realized what he had done and he went nuts. He was screaming and crying for a long time. I went in there and sang him some songs and tickled his arm, but when I got up to leave he freaked out again. It was around 10 when I realized he hadn't really had dinner (I know I am a bad mom). So we fed him a bowl of cereal and he went back to bed and passed out. Glad that was over with. It has been stressing me out for a couple of years now! We made it through the first night and he was still alive! I couldn't believe it. He did cry when he woke up for about 15 minutes. He was convinced he could go trade the bow back, and when we told him it got deposited at the bank he decided we needed to go there to get them back. Then all the sudden he snapped out of it and said, "I traded my bow and arrow, I'm a big boy now!" and he was fine again. Weirdest thing. Then that afternoon he was tired and it was around nap time and he had another fit and snapped out of it the same way. That second night was easier than the first and the third night was even better. Today he only asked about it once. I never thought we would see this day. Seriously. What a relief! And knock on wood but he hasn't tried to take Eli's away yet. It can only get better right?

All I have to say Parker -It's about time kid~! You are growing up. And I am not sad about any of these recent milestones. The only thing I cringe about is the fact that your nap time no longer exists. But for the most part you pretty much entertain yourself so I can get stuff done! I love you little boy!

P.S. A big thanks to Grandma Bonnie for sending Elmo's Potty Time for Parker...it's been a big hit!

Potty Time!

I have been dreading this day since before I had children. Going potty is so gross and I don't want to teach a little monster how to do it! I knew it was gonna be a chore but I have always hoped I would just have an easy kid. Well Parker has never been EASY....so I should have known better! We have been talking to Parker about going potty since he was about 2, and we even let him sit on the toilet a few times. There was a few times we got a little tinkle out, but he just wasn't ready. He even got to the point where he wouldn't even go near the toilet.

Brian got frustrated a couple months ago and just put underwear on the kid to let him feel what it is like to be wet. Parker freaked out of course, and I put diapers on the poor guy again.

The last couple weeks we have really been talking to him about going potty and going into a lot of details with him. Parker actually brings up the subject most of the time, so we decided it is probably time to give it another try. But Parker still didn't want anything to do with the toilet or his little seat. So I decided maybe he needs his own little potty to try out.

On Monday I took Parker to pick out his very own potty. He was so excited he wanted to take his clothes off at the store and try it out! He first picked a little pink frog, but I talked him into the green one instead. Brian still thinks it is girly, but it's Parker's potty and that's the one he wanted!

We brought the potty home and Parker got right on it and went pee! He was so excited! I tried to give him some M&Ms but he freaked out cause there weren't enough to cover the bottom of the bowl. OCD. Anyways, after that blew over he was a little bit worried about the potty. On Tuesday Parker tried sitting on the potty but nothing. His friends were over and I think that kind of messed things up. He didn't go all day, and didn't seem to really care. I was so bummed. I asked a couple friends for some tips and decided to start fresh today.

So first thing we took off his diaper and put on underwear. I told him not to get it wet and he ran over to the potty and sat right down and went pee! We were so excited. I gave him a red vine and he loved it. He played for like 5 minutes and then asked for more candy. I told him he had to go potty if he wanted more so he took off his underwear and sat on the toilet for like 45 minutes!! I kept telling him he could play til he was ready to go again, but he was determined to get that candy. Sure enough after awhile there was some pee and poo in the potty! He was ecstatic! So was I! I think he is really getting it this time. I just need to stick it out and keep the underwear on him. I think it is gonna be a tough couple weeks but it should be worth it. He is a good kid, maybe it was me that wasn't ready....

OOPS! Before I could even post Parker had an accident on the floor. Atleast it wasn't the carpet. No biggie....thats what I get for not paying attention right?

“Huh? Whatch you talkin’ ‘bout mom?”

You seem to ask me that a lot these days and you know what Parker, I am not really sure half of the time either! Hopefully I will be able to write you this letter and make a little bit of sense. You are already 2 and a half, which is crazy, but let's face it…the last six months have been winter and I wouldn't say they have gone by fast. You are an outdoorsman already, seriously kid it is in your blood. Although this winter was pretty mild, most of it was too cold for us to enjoy being out in it. At least while you and your brother are so little. But you sure are a different kid when you are all cooped up inside all the time. Sorry kid, hopefully this next winter will be better.

Now that it is early spring and things are starting to warm up a bit I have been able to let you go outside on your own a few times and walk around the yard with your fishing pole and your dog. I stay by the window and watch you the whole time since our yard is not fenced, but you have been so good to stay out of the roads and in our yard. You have been a bit curious about dog poop, and hoping that is just a normal stage for a little boy. Even so you are pretty quick to stay away when I tap on the window.

Last time you were out you got a little bit braver and started to follow the neighbor's fence out around the back of the house. I finally coaxed you back over but you were pretty upset and when I asked you what was wrong you said, "I wanna go in that castle." Apparently her shed resembled one!

I brought you inside and was talking to you about how fun it will be when you get to go out and play when it gets warm and all the snow melts. I was trying to tell you how exciting it will be to go to the park and play. But then you quickly corrected me, "No, when the snow melts I'm goin fishing at the river!" Trust me, it's in your blood. I guess I am glad we chose Alaska to raise you. Even if it means living so far from so many amazing friends and family, your Dad and I both know this is where we need to be. I think you will thank us some day.

Your communication skills are getting so good so fast! It is really incredible to watch you grow and learn and it hard at the same time to try and teach you the right things. "Dang it" has become a pretty common phrase around the house and one day I was trying to get you to put something away and we were starting to struggle a bit. You looked at me all frustrated and said, "UGHHH! You drive me crazies!" All I could do was laugh. I think we drive each other crazy. I love you kid, but like I said, it has been a LONG winter!

For Christmas Santa decided it was time you needed a dog. Apparently he doesn't need to ask your mother's permission to get you one. Christmas morning you opened the box and there was your very own black lab puppy. I'm not sure if you or your dad likes her more. But so far you two seem to be the only ones she will listen to. I need to try and remember to get you on tape while you command that dog. It is just too funny. You do it all just the way your dad does it, and you do it all on your own! Every morning you rush out to the garage, scoop out just the right amount of food and bring it into the house. Before the dog can eat you make her "SIT" and "STAY, STAY, STAY" and then after a minute or so you order, "Sam, go eat!" and she does it just as you say. You are pretty good at read her signals too, you tell me when she needs a drink or needs to go outside. Even if I don't really like the dog, it is good to see you becoming so responsible and how much you love her.

You are a great helper to have around the house. You are getting pretty good at unloading parts of the dishwasher and you are almost a laundry expert! Sorting comes pretty easy for you and on our new washer and dryer the buttons are at a level you can control. It only took me once to show you how and now you help me every time. You know where the soap goes and I know you want to do it so bad (mostly because every time you insist "I do it") but I never let you. Sorry dude, that's my part. But it is nice of you to tell me where it goes and as I do it you encourage with "Right there, Yep." Your wife is going to have nothing to complain about.

The way your remember things is so incredible. Just the past few months you have been telling us all about things that happened before you could talk much. A lot of your memories seem to be very visual too. When you see something that reminds you of a picture in a book you can run in your room quickly sort through your books and flip to the page you saw it. You have a couple of 12 piece puzzles that only took you a couple of time to figure out. I didn't even have to help, you just did it. Maybe we are underestimating how much you really can do! You still talk about things you got for Christmas, you can navigate around town and the best part is that you can remember most of my grocery list. I just tell you what we are going to get before we leave and we talk about it on the way. Then while we are there you can repeat it as we go. Then when dad comes home you can "member" what we bought. It is fun to see you learning so much.

Probably my favorite part about your changes in the last 6 months is how you learned to sing! I love your little voice and to hear you sing song on your own or with me. "I am a child of God " and "Happy Birthday" seem to be two of your best, but you know a lot of others and it is really sweet. You learn a lot of new songs in nursery and then when you come home and tell us about them we practice even more. Too bad my voice isn't a very good example! It is impossible to hear your little voice and not know that you truly are a child of God. I hope those words will always be in the back of your mind so that you will remember who you are and how much Heavenly Father and Jesus love you.

You have also learned to say a prayer on your own. They are the sweetest and most sincere prayers that you give, and seeing your testimony starting so small has really helped encourage me to be better at teaching you more about the gospel. I need a lot of work, but hopefully someday you will look back and be able to "member" and see that I do love the Lord and that I do have a testimony of the gospel.

We took you to Anchorage in February and we went to a new place that has giant inflatable toys called "Bouncing Bears" and you are still talking about it! You dad and I have never seen you more happy than when you were running around that place. You had a smile from ear to ear and you were in heaven! It was so much fun to see you so happy and full of life. You are such a great kid!

You are growing up, and it is hard. I love having you be so little. We left you in your crib for a pretty long time. In fact it wasn't until January that we decided it was time to take the side off and make it into a toddler bed. You did great, and I knew you would. So a couple weeks later we brought in a new toddler bed for you to sleep in, and then after a couple more weeks we introduced Eli to the crib, and decided to try letting you two share a room. I regret being so hesitant about it because you both did so great! Our next hurdle is the binky. Will you ever give that thing up?

You have a pair of red rubber boots that you wear everywhere. I think it is mostly because you can get them on all by yourself, but it is probably also because you really like them. You wear them around the house with a pumpkin bucket on your head. Silly kid. I'm not sure if I have any picture of it, but I know I have it on video. I know those times are going to be some of my favorite memories of you being little.

Some other fun things about you lately:

• You sit at the table in the big boy chair
  
• You always shut all the doors in the house and you insist they stay shut, this included the toilet lid and the shower door.
  
• You clean up messes really well and I love it!
  
• You line up all your toys when you play, sometime on the table, sometime on the baseboard heater or in the window seal or sometimes just on the floor.
  
• You sleep with your library books
  
• You can smell chocolate from a mile away, I can't even sneak it because you smell it on my breath.
  
• You still dance whenever you hear the slightest beat
  
• You follow me wherever I go…..I can't ever get away from you (or Eli or the dog)!
  
• You still have BIG BROWN EYES that every one comments on when we go places
  

Some funny things you say lately:

• The costumes are chasing me
  
• Mom, Be patient with me (still don't know where you learned this one, but it works)
  
• You call Utah "Youtalk"
  
• Huh? Whatch you talkin' 'bout mom?
  
• Not today K?
  
• 10 minutes k? (you think that you can play with my things as long as it is only for 10 minutes, and K somehow convinces me)
  
• Talk it Mom (When you want me to read something)
  

So far you have gotten by with few injuries, but if you are anything like you dad I am sure many are to come. You first cut was on Friday 3/5/10. We were waiting for you dad to come home from work and make us dinner and it was already 8 and we were all tired. Just as he pulled in the driveway you ran and tripped and smacked your face on the rocking chair and it split your right eye open in the corner. It was a small cut, but it was deep and definitely needed some stitched. The ER doc talked us out of them because you are boy and scars don't matter and he was sure the needle would traumatize you. I think it was a good choice. So we stuck a band aid on it. You were fine even before we went it, but we just wanted to make sure it wasn't a problem with your eyelid. Any closer to your eye and I would have had a lot more to write about I'm sure.

Keep it up kid. You are growing up to be a pretty good boy and really great helper. You are an example to your little brother and I am sure you will be your whole life. That should be a good enough reason to make good choices and be a good example instead of a bad one. But I trust you little man. You seem to be doing just fine. You are more than I ever expected you to be, and the best first born I ever had! I love you so much, hopefully your good little memory won't remember how long and boring this winter was. I promise it gets better. Let's see what the next 6 months bring!

P.S. Picture for this post coming soon....just had to get it up here since it is two weeks late already.

$3 toddler bed makeover!

We've been trying to get Eli out of the portable crib in our bedroom for awhile now. But if you read my recent post about our night time routine....you understand why that hasn't happened earlier! Anyway one of the things we needed to do is get Parker out of the crib. So first we started by taking the side off the crib and putting up the toddler rails. I was surprised how well he did with the transition. He has only fallen out of bed once...and he didn't even cry! The next step was to move him into a toddler bed....which we just happened to get for free from a friend this summer! Only problem was the bed was freakishly red....and it reminded us a little of a clown!

I guess there is some blue in there too, but it just didn't fit. So I bought some brown spray paint for $3 and Brian took care of that for us!

Parker has been sleeping in his new bed so well! I would show you what it looks like in his room but we haven't moved the double bed out yet, so it is pretty much in the middle of the floor looking ridiculous! But we out one step closer to having our bedroom back! I'll let you know how the rest goes....I'm sure!

And it just so happened that we had been storing this toddler bed in the store of our basement, and we are starting to finish the basement up to open for customers and so it was the perfect time to spray paint it without worrying about a mess, and we needed to get the bed out of there anyway! Don't you just love it when things work out??